Real life

I am so tired this week. The preparation for my breast cancer awareness public forum tomorrow has been quite stressful. I resented it even up to this morning when I had to wake up early and drive over to the hospital for a rehearsal with my boss. For me, the public forum would be just a simple educational thing, something fun and something out of my very mundane and routine life in Sandakan. I was hoping that I would feel the rush of standing in front of a crowd but talking about something that I see everyday in my work, which would not be a very big deal. But for my boss, who's a dinosaur super consultant, I have a very important work, I'm the ambassador for the hospital, I'm the learned one, the one with the most influential role, which are all true. The week-long process was eye-opening. I'm glad however I finally see the wisdom of the whole process even before the actual event. But I can't give credit all to myself for the perspicacious moment of realization. It's hugely because of the constant reassurance and sharing of opinion by my 2 colleagues, C and J, that helped me through this week.

Another dose of reality this week. 2 weeks ago, there was a police officer who was admitted to my ward for acute severe pancreatitis, but on the same day of admission he was transfered to the ICU, where he was observed for 4 days. Once he was transfered out to the general ward (my ward), the problem began. He was still having a temperature and on IV antibiotic, but physically he was getting better. The morning he was transfered out, he requested to be transfered to KK Hospital (which required flying with doctor's escort) the next day so that he could be with his family. Because of the resources involved, the non-urgent nature of his condition and for the reason that he was improving, we couldn't accomodate him, and convinced him that if he waited it out for a few more days, he could be discharged well and travel back to KK on his own. The patient agreed. But later that day, when I was busy in the morning general clinic which stretched to afternoon FNAC clinic, I was called several times in the clinic, which interrupted my work, from the ward sister that patient requested to be transfered anyways, after all the explaining on my part. So I asked the sister to inform the patient that I'll see what I can do the following morning. I couldn't just drop everything in the clinic and run back to the ward to settle this "non-urgent" thing. There were so many patients waiting. *sigh* The following morning, I spoke to the patient again. This time his wife was with him. He was still running a temperature. This time, patient was silent and his domineering wife took over the "negotiation". She insisted her husband to be transfered that morning. They were leaving irregardless we let them or not.

To be continued...