A limb for a fish

This man who can't speak Malay, English or anything local Sabahan but claimed he was a Bajau (a local ethnic group here in Sabah) came to the casualty with his right leg missing. "Sorry ma'am, no English" he said in a very thick Tagalog accent. Duh. Anyways, he claimed (2nd hand story from the paramedics who grilled him about the event that cost him his leg) that 3 barrels of oil exploded below his house when a neighbour's children were playing with fire nearby. He and his friend were near the house when the explosion occured. He lost his leg and his friend had a very big laceration wound also on his leg with shrapnels embedded in his flesh. No one else was apparently injured in the "explosion"). STUPID LIE. How can he only suffer a missing leg with no other injuries on his body and his friend too a local wound on his leg with such a huge explosion? I think they were "fishing" with dynamites. Whatever. "Mana kaki kau?" I asked. I heard a paramedic across the resuscitation hall mumbled, "Sudah dimakan ikan".


I'm going for a medical camp in Telupid this weekend! I'm so excited. I need to break this continuous work mode and get out. I usually don't enjoy meeting new people that much, especially when I have to meet people in my field outside working hours. It's intrusive of my personal time. But I'm so impressed by the commitment of the organizing leader of this very massive outreach programme that I'm actually very eager to meet this very old and wise surgeon again. He was also the organizing chairman for another camp 2 years back which I had the priviledge to be a part of. Will be leaving Sandakan 5am on Saturday and back late Sunday evening. Because I'm actually traveling from Sandakan, I only have to spend one night at the camp site. The main group will be traveling from KK, starting their journey around 3pm on Friday, so they have to stay an extra night before the actual programme in Telupid.


Thinking back about the whole MOs and department placement thingy, it's funny that the whole situation is complicated only by the MOs. As MOs, our job is to serve and interest 2nd priority. Another MO who wants my place in the surgical department was trying to "psycho" me yesterday. She was asking whether I really wanted to pursue surgery, and that she would have a big pair of shoes to fill when we swap department in January, how I've become my surgeon's pet, how all the staff in the ward loves to be oncall with me because despite how busy the calls get, I'm the most calm and collected, and I never get crossed with the nurses, how thorough my reviews are, etc. I know she wants to pursue surgery, I know that and that's the main reason why I'm not going to protest this swap that the hospital director decided. I would feel very guilty if I consciously prevent another colleague from being in the field he or she wants to pursue. I would sacrifice that eventhough I really want to stay put for many reasons, just because I know she wants to do surgery and I don't.


"Do you want to leave?" my specialist asked me during a hemicolectomy after I told him the news. "I don't know really what I want to do, so I can't say whether I want or not want to leave." I didn't want to say "yes" outright because I wanted to stay but I know I shouldn't. And I didn't want to say "no" outright because I felt that if I did, he would intervene on my behalf, which I didn't want. So I'm going to just leave everything to fate, OMG, and see where I'll be in 2 months time. Wherever that it, I'll go on. I'll be alright. I just pray that I'll be happy and useful and learning.